9JKL – No! Just No!

9JKL – (L-R) Harry Roberts (Elliott Gould), Judyt Roberts (Linda Lavin), Eve Roberts (Liza Lapiri), Andrew Roberts (David Walton) and Josh Roberts (Mark Feuerstein) – Photo courtesy of CBS.

CBS’ new comedy (and I use that word advisedly) 9JKL (Mondays, 8:30/7:30C) is the ongoing tale of an actor, Josh Roberts (Mark Feuerstein, Royal Pains) whose show gets canceled and he loses all his money in a divorce – meaning he has to return to New York City and live in the apartment next door to his parents.

Compared to the series premiere of 9JKL, 2 Broke Girls (another CBS comedy – waddaya know?) took place in a convent!

The premiere opens with Harry (Elliott Gould) and Judy Roberts (Linda Lavin) cooing over what sounds like it should be a grandchild – instead, it’s their fortysomething son, Josh (Feuerstein). And that’s just to open.

The remainder of the premiere finds Josh trying to avoid his mother – who always seems to know when he’s coming home – and struggling to have a life while his parents, brother Andrew (David Walton), sister-in-law and their baby are constantly coming in and out of his apartment (they’d been using it for storage – the phrase ‘Costco run’ will never be same for anyone after this half hour).

Harry and Judy are crude, licentious and so passive-aggressive that not only are they not funny from the get-go, the writers recycle every gag until it’s torture (which is to say, more than once).

Jokes about Harry’s balls and Eve’s breast milk are only the beginning. There a number of scenes that could be taken as a bit more than vaguely suggesting incest. Why Linda Lavin signed on for this crap is beyond me.

When Josh meets an old friend from college and learns that she’s also gone through a breakup, he’s thrilled until he learns why – her ex’s nightmarishly overbearing parents! And yet, he still tries to go on a date with her and, worse, takes her back to his apartment.

Anyone who doesn’t see the ensuing chaos coming is welcome to try to enjoy it.

Apparently, 9JKL is based on events in Feuerstein’s real life. I’m hoping that the show is a gross exaggeration of reality (emphasis on gross). Otherwise… well, I don’t even want to contemplate that!

There are a couple new shows that deserve instant cancelation – Marvel’s Inhumans is one; this is the other. Better that they had never been greenlighted…

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