The LEGO Movie Falls to Pieces! Michelle’s Review

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The LEGO Movie is a prime example of why movie theater owners are right to complain about trailers. I felt like I saw the movie and was ready to love it before I even walked in the door. Imagine my disappointment when it ended up being different than the advertising campaign.

This is where I say, I never owned a LEGO set so I don’t have a particular affinity for the game, although I do understand the appeal of it. I’m not saying this is a bad movie; the wry, LEGO, humor that I’ve come to love from all my time playing the video games his here in full force. The problem is, I felt like I was watching a 2 hour long video game trailer and not an a real movie.

The super shiny animation style started to give me a slight headache. The sheen on the yellow and lighting affects were so bright that at times it felt like I was staring at the sun. Never thought I’d say this, but I would have welcomed bad 3D to dull it a bit.

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Written by committee, the story is so convoluted that it is both wonderful and unnerving at the same time. It is as if a 10-year old boy was in his bedroom playing with LEGOs (or GI Joe Pieces) told this story as a stream of conscious exercise. The 3rd act “twist” only cemented this feeling and completely killed any sense of fun or whimsy in the movie. Yes, it was done to give the film some weird kind of “heart” that parents could relate to, but I found it cold, calculating and cheesy.

What is this film trying to teach kids? The main bad guy is subtly named Lord Business (Will Ferrell) and his whole reason for being evil is that he hates all the chaos that individuality and creativity brings.

This is why master builders like Batman (Will Arnett), the incredibly awesome Wildestyle (Elizabeth Banks), the cute and cuddly Unikitty (Alison Brie) and a host of other cameo appearances from Superman to Gandalf, are “evil” in the eyes of Lord Business. He wants order, darn-it and will destroy all the various Lego Worlds to get it.

I was fine with this moral message until the wretched third act where hero Emmet’s (Chris Pratt) solution to the problem was to force all the master builders to suppress their individuality and work as a team by following his plan “to the letter.” How is this a good moral lesson for kids? I won’t even get into the ridiculous, movie destroying “cameo” at the end.

The voice acting was actually decent. I liked that the producers, for the most part, didn’t pick well-known voices. This made Morgan Freeman’s sage character Vitruvius all the more annoying. Every time he spoke it took me out of the film.

I’m not going to say I didn’t enjoy this movie on a basic level, because it was hysterically funny in small doses, but it doesn’t work as an actual movie and completely falls apart in the end.

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45 thoughts on “The LEGO Movie Falls to Pieces! Michelle’s Review”

  1. First off, your spelling is the pits. Did you even proofread this?
    Second, you never explained how it was different from the trailers.
    Third, “written by committee”? The script is by Phil Lord and Chris Miller, a fairly long-time comedy writing duo.

    1. RT really needs to vet their reviewers. It’s a shame that home office hacks like this get to taint a great movie experience. They should thoroughly review her “reviews” and pull the plug on this waste of internet space.

  2. Parts of this review sound like they were written by a 4 year-old, coupled with terrible reasoning and horrendous grammar. No wonder this dumbfuck couldn’t appreciate the movie.

  3. ” It is as if a 10-year old boy was in his bedroom playing with LEGOs (or GI Joe Pieces) told this story as a stream of conscious exercise”

    That’s one of the whole points of the movie. It’s a creative flow filled with laughs and the impossible. Sounds like you fell asleep 2 minutes in, woke up in the end and wondered how you got there.

  4. “I liked that the producers, for the most part, didn’t pick well-known voices.”

    Yeah, like Liam Neeson, Will Ferrell, Jonah Hill, Chris Pratt…I could keep going. That misstep characterizes your review perfectly. Have you been living under a rock?

    1. …Morgan Freeman? If I was going to pick on recognisable voice from this film then that’d be the only choice for me.

      1. Agreed, but she already mentioned him antithetically in the review, so I didn’t feel the need to repeat it.

    2. Agreed. This film has THE MOST STAR-SPANGLED CAST of any animated film in the recent future! This review is complete garbage.

  5. Look at the movies that you have reviewed before, most of your review is unhelpful.. The fact that you liked bad movies and hated good movies should be a major reason for you to think about switching career as a movie critic. Have a happier life!

  6. What a sad, sad life you must lead Ed.
    Michelle, you better find yourself another career. There’s no shame in admitting you suck at something.

  7. Just curious from the trailer what did you think the movie would be about? Did you want more Batman?

  8. First of all, you spelled Gandalf wrong. Second of all, this: “I was fine with this moral message until the wretched third act where hero Emmet’s (Chris Pratt) solution to the problem was to force all the master builders to suppress their individuality and work as a team by following his plan “to the letter.” How is this a good moral lesson for kids?”

    It’s a good moral lesson for kids because there are times to think outside the box and there are times not to. This is shown perfectly at the end when the dad and kid realize that they BOTH are right. Lord Business is credited with being the one who started this all. The dad built this whole city, which the kid thinks is awesome, and he wants to add his creativeness. When the two are combined: rules AND creativity, then you achieve greatness and art.

  9. Wow. I am so glad I don’t know you in person. What a Debbie Downer you are. I like the complete lack of original thought in this review. Congrats, Mrs. Business.

  10. G.I. Joe Pieces!!! That addicting toy from Hasbro where you can build anything you can imagine as long as you build it out of broken rubber bands, detached action-figure legs, loose assorted plastic missiles and tiny weapons designed for kung-fu grip! Watch out Lego!

    Wow this reviewer must have really been abused as a kid; no Lego blocks at all, a girl forced to play with broken bits of boys military action-figures and (it seems plausible) a defective Speak-N-Spell which only gave wrong answers!?!?! I say we start a collection of Lego sets to try to salvage some sort of childhood, if there is still time, for poor Michelle!!!

  11. This critic also gave Desolation of Smaug a D, Catching Fire a C-, and Gravity a C. Someone should fire her already.

    1. Well, Desolation of Smaug did suck with far too many plot holes and unexplained events, Catching Fire was basically a retelling of the first movie with a few added parts and not everybody was all that excited about Gravity either. However, I don’t know if I’d give any of them that low of a rating, maybe Catching Fire, since not much really happened in that. That said, maybe she needs to see the movie in 2D. 3D effects take you out of the movie sometimes and she even noted that in the review. If you’re going to review a movie, then see it in 2D.

      1. What you said about the movies is all opinion based. What I meant by that was all three of the above movies were very well received by critics and yet this critic bashed all three of them.

        1. There’s definitely a place for a good contrarian review. Sometimes a good movie just rubs someone the wrong way, and a talented critic can spin that “feeling” into some good insights about the subject.

          But this is *not* one of those reviews.

  12. *SPOILERS in this comment*

    “I was fine with this moral message until the wretched third act where hero Emmet’s (Chris Pratt) solution to the problem was to force all the master builders to suppress their individuality and work as a team by following his plan “to the letter.” How is this a good moral lesson for kids?”

    Uh….it doesn’t work. Following Emmet’s plan to the letter gets them all captured. It’s only after he learns to be creative and spontaneous that things start to go well for him.

  13. Slight Spoilers…

    “Written by committee, the story is so convoluted that it is both wonderful and unnerving at the same time. It is as if a 10-year old boy was in his bedroom playing with LEGOs (or GI Joe Pieces) told this story as a stream of conscious exercise.”

    Are you kidding me? That is quite literally what was going on. You missed the point of this film entirely.

    1. Yeah, I have to say, I don’t usually join in the pile-ons of critics with unpopular opinions, but that was a really weird comment. Also, referring to Will Ferrell as a cameo when he had been playing one of the main characters the entire film, and the fact that the voice and the father were the same guy was the whole reason he was there.

  14. Let’s review some of Michelle Alexandria recent reviews just to prove what an incredible moron she really is….

    She gave “Lone Ranger” (34% on RT) an A-
    She gave “After Earth” (11% on RT) a B-
    She gave “Sky Fall” (92% on RT) an F
    She gave “Hunger Game” (87% on RT) a D.

    I could go on, but you get; she’s an idiot.

        1. That’s an assumption. Making assumptions makes an ass out of you. That’s what my teacher taught me.

          1. Bookmark this blog, come back after a year and check out the scores. If the trend remains then call your teacher and tell her you’ve discovered science. You know, making assumptions and then (in)validating them experimentally.

          2. The act itself is what makes him worthy of being an ass, whether he’s right or wrong. Clever idea though.

  15. I am going to see the movie this weekend, but let me try to explain the ending that confused the morals for you. Without seeing it, I think they were trying to say individuality is great, but sometimes you need to work together for a single, uniform goal in order to have the best results. I’m guessing, but I hope that is what they were aiming for and that it can help you enjoy the movie if only a little more! ^ ^

  16. I rarely comment on film reviews because ultimately it is the reviewers opinion and I think everyone should be entitled to an opinion. With that said Michelle needs to consider a new profession. She is not a writer and chose poorly when choosing a movie to review.

  17. I think its pretty obvious she is a paid to be an equalizer in the Rotten Tomatoes kingdom. Somebody has to balance out the betting lines. Not every great movie can score a 100% and not every terrible film can get a 0. The more you look at her history, the more obvious this becomes.
    Everything is awesome in Lego Movie.

  18. How is Emmet’s solution a good moral lesson for kids? It teaches them that they can’t expect to be creative and individualistic free spirits 100% of the time because some jobs require teamwork, compromise, and yes, even playing by the rules. I think that’s a very important lesson.

  19. Ok..time to pack your suitcase and start to do something else, because this review is TERRIBLE ! Did you really watched LEGO’s movie? o_O

  20. Well it’s a movie, and not all movies need a moral. The moral basically is do the unexpected and work together. Almost all of the actors are well known except Chris Pratt, and that is only if you don’t watch Parks and Recreation.

  21. If you like celebrities winking at you, rehashed plots, cynicism and irony, and primetime TV humor, you’ll love the Lego movie. Otherwise the author of this article hit the nail on the head.

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