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It’s the largest stop so far on the Idol Audition Tour.
*Celebrity Judge: Shania Twain , she still “Feels Like A Woman” and confesses she would pee on herself if she had to audition for Idol. She actually did that once!
*Number of Contestants: 12,000
*Name to Remember: CHARITY VANCE and her fantastic rendition of “Summertime.”
*The One You Hope To Forget: BRIAN KRAUSE and his spasmodic “Tip Toe Through The Tulips.”
*Most Heart Warming Story: ANGELA MARTIN, third time is a charm!
*Quote of the Night: “You have a great bottom.” -Shania Twain talking about JOHN PARK’s lower register, we think.
FULL SHOW RECAP AFTER THE BREAK
We get a very heartfelt story from our first contestant, KATELYN EPPERLY, 19, Des Moines, IA, so we know she is going to be good because Idol doesn’t give us sob stories for bad contestants. Her parents just recently split and her Idol audition is the first time they are not together to see her perform. Something tells me a powerful voice is about to come forth when she sings Duffy’s “Syrup & Honey.” Yeah, I was right. Great voice from Katelyn. So nice to start the show with something good!!! Four YES votes and young Katelyn is going to Hollywood.
AMY LANG, 26, Westchester, OH, is our next contestant and I so badly want to slap her I can hardly stand it. Where do these people come from? She’s just so over the top and she thinks she’s cute, funny cute, but she’s not. She even has inappropriate dreams about Ryan. Yuck! I draw the line though at her pretending to pass out as part of her performance. That’s when you know she is going to be bad. She starts singing “Dr. Feelgood” by Aretha Franklin and yes, oh yes, SHE – IS – BAD!!! Not to mention that weird thing she does with her boobs. Ugh! Although Simon does have a good line when he says, “I’m going to say no, Amy. They’re not going to go to Hollywood” — her boobs and her.
CHARITY VANCE, 16, Little Rock, AR – We immediately meet Charity’s family at their hair salon, so we know she will be good. Idol Producers, after 9 years, we get the patterns. Anyway, Charity looks scared to death as she auditions. However, she sings “Summertime” and the look on Shania’s face says it all – THIS GIRL CAN SING! Four YES votes and Hollywood gets a new Charity.
We come back to a montage of one bad song after another. Actually, I am grateful that we are seeing it in a montage and not having to sit through these horrible songs. Side note to people in costumes: STOP IT! Have you seen anyone in a costume advance beyond Hollywood week? No, you haven’t. STOP IT!
On with the show…
ANGELA MARTIN, 27, Chicago – This is Angela’s third time auditioning and at age 27, it’s her last. Angela’s father died a week after Idol audition in 2007. He was supposed to make the Hollywood trip with her. In 2008, she made the top 50, but had to bail out on the auditions because she had to be in court to take care of a traffic snafu. Will the third time be the charm? I hope so because I like her tenacity. She gives off good energy, that Angela Martin. She says she will sing “Just Fine” by Mary J. Blige. Angela was “Just Fine” in that performance. Great vocals on a song that’s not so easy to sing because there is only one Mary J. With 4 YES votes, although Simon initially said NO just to tease her, Angela is off to Hollywood. Note to Angela: Kick some bootay in L.A. You deserve it.
Day 2 begins…
CURLEY NEWBERN, 26, Chicago – He comes in and sings Maxwell’s “A Woman’s Worth.” Well, at least that’s what he told us he was singing. I don’t know what came out of his mouth, but it wasn’t music. Randy has to turn his back to keep from laughing. Simon doesn’t even do that. He just laughs. Four NOs. Next.
ALANNAH HALBERT, 19, Chicago – She sings “I’ll Always Love You” but if she keeps singing it that way, not many people will.
BRIAN KRAUSE, 27, Pittsburgh, PA — I’m sorry. All I can say is, “What the h**l was that?” He looks like he is having a spasm while singing “Tip Toe Through The Tulips.” I’m going to be running through them if he keeps singing. I’ll reserve further comment until Brian’s psychological evaluation is in.
HAROLD DAVIS, 25, Chicago – Harold wants to eat steak, not microwave dinners. He starts singing Usher’s “Nice and Slow” and every cow in America breathes a sigh of relief. However, you have to feel bad for Harold who breaks down and cries when the judges tell him he’s not getting a golden ticket. Poor Harold.
CHANTELLE GRACZKOWSKI, 23, Fond du Lac, WI – She felt confident she was going to get a golden ticket. I was confident she wasn’t. I won.
JOHN PARK, 20, Northbrook, IL — John is a very nice looking young Asian man who wanted to study voice in college, but Mom and Dad didn’t like that. He decides to follow his dream… and we’re glad he did. He has a nice soulful voice, although I’m not sure if Shania is flirting with him or not. Four YES votes and John is going to La La Land.
PAIGE DCHAUSSE,21, Morris, IL — We know Paige is going to be great. She has a heartwarming storm about going into anaphylactic shock when she was 15 years old and surviving. Doctors thought she was going to be brain damaged. Instead, she is auditioning for Idol and singing, “A Change Is Gonna Come” from Sam Cook. I thought she was pretty damn good, but Simon didn’t and gives her a NO vote. Shania and Kara give YES votes, so Randy must decide. After some arm twisting by the ladies, he relents and young Paige is Hollywood bound.
And in the last two minutes, three auditions get squeezed in.
JUSTIN RAY, 20, Marysville, IN – Four YES votes and he cries for joy!
KEITH SEMPLE, 27, Hanover Park, IL – Simon says NO, but the others say YES. Golden Ticket time.
MARCUS JONES, 18, Gary, IN – Four YES votes for Marcus and he too is off to L.A.
That’s a wrap for Chicago with 13 Golden Tickets handed out.
UP NEXT… Orlando, FL and Kristen Chenoweth.
Until then…MENDHEIM OUT