American Idol – Another week of boring Ballads

Hey, I’m back with another round of Idol Watch – sorry I don’t have a catchy original name for this.  Last week I attended a screening and got home late, so I wasn’t in the mood to stay up until 2am to discuss another round of bad karaoke – especially after I saw that they were going to butcher the Beatles for a 2nd week in a row.  As I write this, we’re about 10 minutes into the show. I have to give it another 40 minutes on my Tivo before I can actually turn it on and start watching. What to do during this down period? I think I’m going to play a little of the new Halo 3 Heroic Maps for an hour.

Ok, I played a little Halo, remembered why I hate that game. But I did get my kill on with the Swords until some annoying kid came on and ruined the match for the rest of us.  Now I’m primed and ready to watch Idol. It’s funny, I hate being in DC because my Idol tickets came through last week for tonight’s taping! So if things were different I would be blogging from the show itself.  I’m waiting for them to announce tonight’s theme.  Ah, it’s "the year they were born."

First up is the consistently boring Ramiele Malubay. Let’s see what she does. She does Heart’s Alone. And 10 seconds in, she sucks and is surprise boring. I’m skipping ahead to the judges comments.  Randy didn’t like it, Paula didn’t like it and sounds like she smoked a pack of cigarettes. Simon thought it was, Ok and once again tries to lead the viewers into keeping her around saying there’s no question she’s going to make it through.  We’re supposed to feel sorry for her because she’s sick this week, but that doesn’t explain away her last 5 crappy performances. Have I said recently how much I’m sick of Simon trying to dictate the voting this year?

It time for my dreadlock man Jason Castro. I actually think he’s decent, but again he’s pretty boring. I couldn’t imagine anyone paying money to hear him sing. I don’t know what’s going on this week, but Ryan is mumbling and I can’t decipher these song titles. I wish Idol would put up a little song title tag.  I think this is Sting’s Fragile. Jason has the Guitar again. He’s terrible this week, I’m skipping to the comments.  Randy thought it was alright. I’m overwhelmed by his "underwhelmnous."  Paula couldn’t be less enthusiastic. Simon said it was like someone playing outside a subway station.

Hey, it’s a black girl. Gotta throw some love out to Syesha Mercado. She’s doing If I was your Woman. It’s starting out pretty good, I’m going to stick with this one. She took one of my favorite songs and turned it into this boring nightclub rendition that sounded like she was screaming.  Randy LOVED it. Drunk Paula LOVED it.  I think I’m missing something here, I hated it.  Simon didn’t like it as much as the other two.

I don’t get the Chikezie thing. He’s doing "If Only for One Night."  Come on do any of these wannabe’s know how to sing anything FUN? Week after week, it’s these boring, lame ballads – not even "Power" ballads.  Randy thought it was too old school.  Paula of course liked it. Simon thought the performance was cheesy. I’m ready to bail on this week’s Idol.

Brooke White is doing Every Breath You Take. She’s sitting at the Piano. Hmmm…  I’m really starting to like her, she has a great voice and she’s making the song hers. My problem with her is, she just looks so generic, but she has some chops. I like her. Randy was bored with it. Not sure what Paula is saying. Says she’s consistent.  Simon thought it was ok, and once again he’s saying "definitely will be there next week."  Brooke has made me interested in staying with this a while longer.

Now we get the fake Australian Michael Johns. He’s doing We Will Rock You/We Are The Champions.  He’s terrible, but he’s getting the rock star treatment with the fancy lighting and camera work.  But he sucks. I’ll give him points for at least attempting an power ballad.  The judges went crazy for it. What is this hard on the judges have for this guy, week after week they love him. But tonight they act like they haven’t been cheerleading him all along.

It’s the Irish Chick, Carly Smithson, who lost her record company over $3 million. Let’s see what she does this week.  Total Eclipse of the Heart??? WTF?  This was one of my all time favorite songs. Now I’m perking up.  She has the slow part down and she’s nailing this. If we could get rid of the bad background singers.  She nailed it. Best performance of the night, hands down. What’s wrong with Randy, he didn’t like it? Paula loved it. Simon didn’t like it. Am I watching a totally different show?

Up now we have the kid who I despise the most, this David Archuleta, I have no idea what this song is he’s singing – at least it’s an upbeat song. I’m fast forwarding. My guess is the judges will love him. None of the judges knew the song either, but they all loved him. But hey, what’s this? Simon hated the performance.  Called it a theme park song sung by theme park animatronics. Classic.

Kristy Lee Cook doing God Bless the USA. Boy, talk about a shameless play for votes.  Usually I hate her artificial country sound, but this is a perfect choice for her. And the band is on point. Second best performance tonight. Judges don’t have much to say, they liked it. Simon agrees with me, thought it was the most clever song choice in years.

The other wannabe rocker David Cook is doing another song that I’ve never heard.  Wait a sec, is this Billie Jean? Done as a slow as Rock Ballad?  Hmmm… Interesting. Brave choice the way he’s doing it. He’s nailing this weird take on it. It’s hot. I’m sold. Brilliant performance. I’ll be shocked if the judges don’t go gaga. Judges went crazy over this. It was a truly unique performance and take on it.

The front half of tonight sucked, but it picked up.  My bottom three would be Ramiele, Jason, and Chikezee. I think Jason’s going home this week.